catch 22

to believe it might actually work out this time
to get excited about the prospect of possibly meeting the one
to anticipate that your prayers will finally be answered
to trust with all your heart that -maybe- the moment has arrived
- is setting yourself up for painful disappointment

but..to expect disappointment
to prepare yourself for the worst
to lower your expectations
to brace yourself in advance for that painful blow
- is setting yourself up for definite failure-by-self-fulfilling-prophecy

feels like a lose-lose situation
..maybe I just need more lipgloss.